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Building Successful Teams by Making Sure you are Communicating on the Same Scale
Team meetings often go wrong when we communicate on different scales without being aware of it. Successful teams recognize this and by doing so they prevent time consuming and exhausting discussions.
“If you drive to, say, Shenandoah National Park, or the Great Smoky Mountains, you’ll get some appreciation for the scale and beauty of the outdoors. When you walk into it, then you see it in a completely different way. You discover it in a much slower, more majestic sort of way.” – Bill Bryson
Not always easy to explain. I will try to explain it to you as follows.
Successful teams have an antenna that filters out three types of scale in communication:
a WHY scale,
a WHAT scale, and
a HOW scale
Having a WHY-oriented discussion, why is this important, is different from having a WHAT-oriented discussion. WHAT do we need to achieve is different from HOW are we going to do this, how are we going to make it work. These are different types of discussions.
Teams that navigate successfully through complex situations have developed a specific antenna that filters out the question: are we really talking at the same scale here, or not?
They are aware that in some cultures – for example, in hierarchical cultures – people are generally interested in hearing from the leader HOW he or she wants to do things. In consensus cultures, on the other hand, people will more often think: if the why and what are clear, then empower me on how to make things work, and I will feed it back to you.
Here is a real-life example
I was once working with a European leadership team on an important strategy execution topic, when an argument broke out between the German managing director and the Italian managing director. There was lots of negative energy in the room, lots of irritation, the meeting threatened to go wrong.
Then the CEO stepped in. He intervened; he interrupted their argument.
‘Could it be that we are talking on different levels here?’
Turning to the German managing director, he asked: ‘Why are you so irritated?’
Tapping irritably on the table with his fingers, the German managing director answered:
‘We already spent an hour discussing why this project would make sense, but we are still in the dark as to how we are going to do it. I don’t like that. We can dream up all kind of plans, but if we don’t look at the details then this simply won’t go anywhere.’
The CEO then addressed the Italian managing director, putting the same question to him.
This is what the Italian said:
‘My German friend is dragging his heels. He always finds a reason why we shouldn’t go ahead and do it. I don’t feel he is committed.’
The team continued talking, and what they learned was that their German colleague was rather strongly oriented towards how and fact and detail. In the meetings I had with him, I was usually impressed about his thorough and detailed knowledge of what was at stake.
The Italian colleague was more thinking along the line: if we really believe this is what we should do, if we are convinced that this is what needs to be achieved, then we will find the way. We will find a way together. Left or right, we WILL get there. And by the way: he had done a lot of research. He had all the reports ready. He just thought that it was not the time nor the place to bring them to the table.
Scale
Successful teams actively check whether the scale is an issue in a given discussion, they factor in cultural differences, and they adjust the communication scale when necessary. What I mean is this:
If you are stuck on a ‘how’, and you go back to a ’what’ or a ‘why’, you often find common ground together.
Meetings that go wrong often go wrong because we THINK we do not agree. But if we raise the scale, it turns out that we are talking about the same thing. We just approach it differently. It is like entering the harbor with a boat. There is one harbor, but some boats come from the left, while others come from the right, even though the docking place is the same.
“I decided that if I could paint that flower in a huge scale, you could not ignore its beauty.”
Georgia O’Keeffe
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Aad Boot is a global business advisor, change & transformation leader/program manager, executive team facilitator, leadership coach, and frequently asked keynote speaker. He is founder and managing partner at HRS Business Transformation Services.
Hanneke Siebelink is research partner and writer at HRS Business Transformation Services, and author of several books and the Expert Series. She is currently studying Mandarin Chinese.
Find out more about our team, our services, and keynotes.
‘This too shall pass’ said Lincoln, and What it Means for Leadership Today
For leaders in today’s unpredictable world this quote of Abraham Lincoln is very relevant. Let’s take a closer look at what it means.
When the British still had an Empire (ruled by Queen Victoria) and a weak China was forced down on its knees (Opium wars), a rising Republican politician climbed the stage to hold a speech in the U.S. His name was Abraham Lincoln (not yet elected president, at this point. In fact, he thought that his career had been – in his own words – “a failure, a flat failure.”). Addressing a large gathering of entrepreneurs and farmers in Wisconsin (1859), here is what Lincoln said:
“Some of you will be successful, and such will need but little philosophy to take them home in cheerful spirits; others will be disappointed and will be in a less happy mood. To such, let it be said, “Lay it not too much to heart.” Let them adopt the maxim, “Better luck next time;” and then, by renewed exertion, make that better luck for themselves. And by the successful, and the unsuccessful, let it be remembered, that while occasions like the present bring their sober and durable benefits, the exultations of them are but temporary (…); and that the vanquished this year, may be victor the next, in spite of all competition.
It is said an Eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent him a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations. They presented him the words: “And this, too, shall pass away.” How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction! “And this, too, shall pass away.”
“And this too, shall pass away.” – Abraham Lincoln
Fast forward to 3 or 4 of generations later, where the larger international patterns seem reversed. The state of the world today – the painful Brexit process, the arrival of president Trump, the rise of China (Who is watching China: The New World Order on BBC?) suggests there is indeed a natural cycle at work in our lives, our work environment, our planet: an endless flow of evolution and transformation. Spring turns into summer, turns into autumn, into winter, and into spring again. What comes up, eventually goes down and prepares to rise again, like ocean waves do.
“Change is the only constant” – Yuval Noah Harari
No particular constellation is ever static. Any pattern is temporary and in essence evolving. The ancient Chinese already understood this. They called it Yin and Yang (No wonder Lincoln quoted a monarch from the East).
What does this mean for leadership today?
“The 21st century is a terrible time to be a control freak” – Alec Ross
Some thoughts, coming from personal experience in working with leaders and their organizations during complex change:
True inspiration, satisfaction, and success comes from:
- Learning how to go along/navigate the course of things in an intelligent way, rather than trying to control what cannot be controlled.
- Adopting an open mindset, being eager to explore and learn, being conscious of what we don’t know, rather than holding on to what we know.
- Fostering flexibility. Flexibility always beats rigidity. In structures, in processes, in behaviors … always.
- Paying continuous attention to alignment. Integrate this attention in your daily work, in your teams, in your relationships with business partners.
“This too shall pass away” are good words to remember when you/your teams are hit by an unexpected blow. They are also good words to remember when you/your teams have just struck gold.
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Aad Boot is a global business advisor, change & transformation leader/program manager, executive team facilitator, leadership coach, and frequently asked keynote speaker. He is founder and managing partner at HRS Business Transformation Services.
Hanneke Siebelink is research partner and writer at HRS Business Transformation Services, and author of several books and the Expert Series. Find out more about our team, our services, and keynotes.
Looking Back on Last Week’s Trip to Hyderabad
I just returned from a trip to Hyderabad (visiting my Indian colleagues and teams that work on the corporate transformation program I’m leading for a European retail company) when I came across an interview with Google CEO Sundar Pichai. He explained what he misses about not living in India. That made me reflect and share some experiences of my own.
What Google CEO Sundar Pichai misses about India
Question: What do you miss about not living in India?
Sundar Pichai: “I miss the people, the vibrancy, the noise. It is so quiet around here! Every time I go to India and I come back, that’s what I miss. Everything is silent, so I miss the people, the vibrancy, the life, the colours and the sounds of India.”
Question: What is wonderful about India is the democracy and the diversity. Are you worried that the diversity may be changing a bit, that support for diversity is declining?
Pichai: “If I look at all the difficult times India has gone through, something about India, the scale of the people and how distributed it is, the different states and the different cultures, the only way they can work is by somehow keeping it all together. And there is this magic that has figured out a way to do it over time. So I think a fate in that system, something deeper than all of us, will keep it together for a long time. I think the forces which will bring it together and preserve diversity are far bigger than anything which can pull it apart.” (Watch the interview here)
My own reflections
What strikes me most when I visit India:
The inclusiveness despite different backgrounds
The hospitality and generosity that you find everywhere. The willingness to help. The many invitations to join, having dinner together, being invited to play a game of cricket with the team (‘don’t worry, we will teach you’).
The eagerness to learn and grow
The amount of bright (and young) people. Mainly software engineers, data scientists, data integration specialists, all relentlessly asking all kinds of questions to understand not only what they have to do, but also to understand the larger picture (‘how do we contribute to the strategy of our company?’, ‘how is our work making a difference?’).
Overall, what fascinates me most is what I can probably best describe as experiencing ‘flow’ (as opposed to ‘control’)
- The way people navigate in traffic (still incomprehensible to me)
- The way the teams behave when they encounter complexity, or setbacks, or difficult situations
- The way differences of opinion are turned around gracefully
- The way humor and a smile are used to eliminate stressful situations
- The continuous sentiment of ‘let’s move forward’
My visit to India was again very refreshing, experiencing ‘flow’ and how it practically works, it further enriched and broadened my perspective on the essence of (business) transformation.
Lots of new insights and inspirations … grateful!
Sundar Pichai (born in Chennai in 1972) is, like my Indian friends and colleagues, a big fan of cricket. He fell in love with the sport when he was young and served as captain of his high school cricket team before earning his bachelor of engineering degree from the Indian Institute of Technology and moving on to the US.
Cricket is big in India, and a hell of a game I discovered:
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Aad Boot is a global business transformation advisor, change leader/program manager, executive team facilitator, cross-cultural leadership coach, and frequently asked keynote speaker. He is founder and managing partner at HRS Business Transformation Services.
Find out more about our team, our services, and keynotes.
Thriving in Disruptive Times: How Benjamin Franklin Nailed it.
Benjamin Franklin’s example shows how self-cultivation can be a smart strategy for leaders determined to survive and thrive in disruptive times.
Looking back on a recent trip to Philadelphia (费城), the city where the USA was born, two things made a long lasting impression:
– Walking around in Independence Hall and realizing that the men who declared independence from the British did so at big personal risk. Success was nowhere near guaranteed, prompting Benjamin Franklin to utter his famous words: “We must all hang together or, most assuredly we shall all hang separately”;
– Seeing how Benjamin Franklin, who arrived in Philadelphia aged 17 and signed the Independence Declaration aged 70, left his footprints all over the city (from the printshop where he built his fortune and the University (Penn) he founded to the Franklin Institute displaying his scientific discoveries) and is admired and respected to this day.
Here was someone who survived what must have been disruptive times – arguably at least as disruptive as the period ahead of us today. More than that, he thrived. How did he do it? What was survival skill? Intrigued, I read his both his biography (Edmund S. Morgan, Benjamin Franklin, 2002) and autobiography (Benjamin Franklin, 1793) on the plane back home (Why sleep when you can read)
I found surprisingly topical Franklin quotes that sound like good advice today:
- “You may delay but time will not.”
- “Well done is better than well said.”
- “Reading makes a full man, meditating a profound one.”
I found Franklin’s work schedule that I had come across before, including the first question he asked himself each morning (“What good shall I do this day?”) and the last question he asked before he went to sleep (“What good have I done today?”)
But it was Franklin’s list of 13 character traits (“virtues”) he set out to cultivate that made me sit up in my chair:
- Temperance: Eat not to dullness, drink not to elevation
- Silence: Speak not but what may benefit others or yourself
- Order: Let all your things have their place, let each part of your business have its time
- Resolution: Resolve to perform what you ought; perform without fail what you resolve
- Frugality: Waste nothing
- Industry: Lose no time, be always employed in something useful
- Sincerity: Think innocently and justly and, if you speak, speak accordingly
- Justice: Wrong none by doing injuries, or omitting the benefits that are your duty
- Moderation: Avoid extremes
- Cleanliness: Tolerate no uncleanliness in body, clothes or habitation
- Tranquility: Be not disturbed at trifles, or at accidents common or unavoidable
- Chastity: Rarely use venery but for health or offspring
- Humility: Imitate Jesus and Socrates
I quote:
“I judged it would be well not do distract my attention by attempting the whole at once, but to fix it on one of them at the time; and, when I should be master of that, then proceed to another, and so on, till I should have gone through the thirteen, and, as the previous acquisition of some might facilitate the acquisition of certain others, I arranged them with that view. Temperance first, as it tends to procure that coolness and clearness of head, which is so necessary where constant vigilance was to be kept up, and guard maintained against the unremitting attraction of ancient habits (…) “
Here was a man determined to improve himself in a smart way: step by step, and main things first.
Franklin goes on:
“Conceiving that daily examination would be necessary, I contrived the following method for conducting that examination. I made a little book, in which I allotted a page for each of the virtues, and ruled each page with red ink, so as to have seven columns, one for each day of the week, marking each column with a letter for the day. I crossed each column with thirteen red lines, marking the beginning of each line with the first letter of one of the virtues, on which line, and in its proper column, I might mark, by a little black spot, every fault I found upon examination to have been committed respecting that virtue upon that day (…)”
Franklin upgraded himself by practicing the habits and skills he wanted to acquire and examining his progress every single day.
Let every new year find you a better man. – Benjamin Franklin
I left the plane reminded of the value of discipline (not my strongest point) and inspired by the fact that, no matter how turbulent your work environment gets, there is always something you can do: keep learning and improve yourself (also read our article ‘Leadership Introspection: The Only Person You can Actually Change is Yourself’).
Hanneke Siebelink is Research Partner and Writer at HRS Business Transformation Services, and author of several books. Find out more about Hanneke and HRS services. If you would like to invite us to your organization, contact us here.
This article is part of our Skills for the Future Expert Series in which we share valuable lessons from a list of experts, researchers and role models.
Speaking
Selected as one of the Top 100 Leadership Speakers
(Click here for the full list)
Some of Aad’s most popular keynotes
SIETAR European Annual Congress
A) How to Lead Cross-Cultural Teams
Strengthen your intercultural competence and boost people collaboration and performance across cultures
In our globalized economy, your abilty to build and lead successful cross-cultural teams has become a crucial competency.
You wonder if there is an effective method for getting your team based on three continents to work together successfully.
You want to stimulate your (for instance) Japanese-German-American team’s day-to-day effectiveness.
You spot and observe cultural differences, but know that noticing these differences is not the same as reconciling these and creating team alignment.
Together with cross-cultural leadership expert Aad Boot you will take a closer look at how successful cross-cultural business teams operate, and what differentiates them from other teams.
Aad will offer you practical insights, tips and skills that you can directly use in your own work. Because teams where East (Japan, China, India, ..) and West work together are an increasing business reality, Aad will pay particular attention to bridging the East-West cultural divide.
Questions that Aad will address in this keynote:
- How to encourage openness between team members with different (Asian, Western) backgrounds?
- What are particular challenges for global virtual teams, and how to address those?
- How to deal with hierarchy across cultures?
- How to build trust, despite cultural differences?
- How to get your team from taking good decisions to turning these decisions into concrete and measurable results?
B) Do You Lead Change or Is Change Leading You
How to stimulate adaptability of people and teams while maintaining focus
You are increasingly confronted with changes that cannot be planned upfront and boxed in a traditional project management structure: define it, detail it, roll it out, and then back to business.
Many of today’s changes are related to fast evolving new technologies, and shifting global power structures. It is often unclear exactly what these changes entail, but they have a profound impact on our organization.
You are expected to guide our people through these changes, while finding a way to handle the increased level of complexity and uncertainty associated with it.
You want to motivate your people by presenting them a clear overview of the steps to follow and the results to achieve, but you do not yet have all the answers yourself.
You try to manage resistance and change fatigue, but know that the next change already looms on the horizon.
Questions that Aad will address in this keynote:
- What does change mean to you?
- What are the most effective ways to turn resistance to change into a will to engage?
- Why we don’t need more collaboration, but better collaboration
- How do you recognize the difference between ‘people who work together’ versus ‘people who are aligned’?
- How to help people and teams to maintain focus and direction in times of change?
.
Why do organizations hire Aad?
To learn from his multi-decade experience in guiding business teams through complex change. To be inspired by Aad to move to action. By his energy and enthusiasm combined with a pragmatic and hands-on style.
People who attend Aad’s sessions find he connects with his audience through real-life business stories that offer practical lessons they can immediate use and benefit from.
Aad advises, coaches, and supports leaders and their teams all over the world in leading complex change, dealing with cross-cultural challenges, and post-merger integration issues.
His keynotes and workshops have a powerful and lasting impact on the participants.
As part of kick-off sessions, complex change initiatives, leadership development programs or corporate academies, in large-scale interventions, and other events.
Audiences vary from small teams to groups of 100 – 1000 people or more. Aad delivers his keynotes in English or Dutch.
Words clients typically use when working with Aad:
Focused, Professional, Practical, Energizing, Passion, Out of the Box, Enriching, International, Insightful, Cross border
.
How to Book Aad?
To book Aad for a speaking engagement contact us here for more information and for possible dates. We will be pleased to discuss the details with you.
Contact Aad: aad.boot@gmail.com
Or fill in the form below (your information will stay confidential):
Can Resilience be Taught?
In these time of relentless technological and business change, resilience is starting to receive renewed attention, and is climbing higher on the leadership agenda. Resilience encompasses the ability to recover quickly from setbacks, to respond positively to change, to see the opportunities in work, in life, not just the challenges. Or as Alibaba’s Jack Ma put at Davos 2018 (World Economic Forum): “It is not about what you achieve. It is about what you do when things get tough.”
We can all see around us that people deal very differently with adversity and unexpected setbacks. In changing organizations you can see the difference between resilient and less resilient teams. The resilient ones are faster in finding their way forward. Lack of resilience quicker leads to uncertainty and doubt, to a tendency to revisit decisions already taken and to surrender to the status quo.
When resilient teams are having a rough day, they sometimes quote the super-resilient. Just two random examples:
“It’s a slip and not a fall”
This is what Abraham Lincoln said after countless hours of self-study, a law practice that barely earned him a living, the loss of his first child, two depressions, and his second failed attempt to enter politics and make it to the US Senate. Later, when he is elected president (almost to his own surprise), he has to lead his country through a brutal civil war. He suffers. He loses weight. But he never gives up. (read more here).
“Courage all the time”
American princess Allene Tew, beautifully portayed by Dutch writer Annejet van der Zijl (De Amerikaanse Prinses, 2015), after the sudden loss of GE’s Anson Wood Burchard, her third husband. Allene had already lost her first husband and her three children. She dyes her hair, takes a boat across the Atlantic, starts a second life in Europe, and never looks back.
And there are many more examples.
Have we, in our spoiled society, possibly become too soft?
Hanneke’s yoga teacher thinks we have, and makes his students train the warrior pose. He claims the pose will, over time, re-wire the nervous system. It is an interesting thought: training your resilience with specific physical exercises dating from a time when you defended your own family with your own power and hands.
Can resilience be taught?
Yes, says Psychology Professor Martin Seligman: there is substantial evidence from well controlled studies that skills which increase resilience, including positive emotion, engagement and meaning, can in fact be taught. You can read more here: Harvard Business Review – Building Resilience
Ancient Chinese sages sought to master the art of resilience by accepting, rather than fearing, change as the natural way of the world. 3000 years before the advent of modern quantum physics, they believed that energy or Qi 气 is the invisible master template behind all visible forms and functions of the human system and the world we live in. They claimed that everyone can learn, through regular Qi Gong (气功 or “energy work”) practice, to strengthen and refine his/her energetic reservoir and find a better balance when dealt a heavy blow, professional or personal.
Should we pay more attention to resilience, of ourselves and of our teams?
- How resilient am I?
- How resilient are we as a team?
- Did we become too soft?
- Do we talk about it?
- How can we become stronger in dealing with change, and with unexpected setbacks?
- How can we spend more time developing resilience?
Your experience? Your thoughts?
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Aad Boot is a global business advisor, change leader/program manager, executive team facilitator, leadership coach, and frequently asked keynote speaker. He is founder and managing partner at HRS Business Transformation Services.
Hanneke Siebelink is research partner and writer at HRS Business Transformation Services, and author of several books and the Expert Series.
This Year’s 5 Most Read Articles on Leading Complex Change
Find here the top 5 most read articles on leading complex change and cross-cultural collaboration on LeadershipWatch in 2017. Enjoy!
1) Organizational Alignment: The Power of Cross-Organizational Networks
What will the organizations of tomorrow look like? Will they still hold on to hierarchy and functional departmental structures? Or will they use the power of cross-organizational networks to increase flexibility and adaptability?
2) Stop Believing These Persistent Myths About Leading Change
Leading change in today’s world requires a different approach to change. Some persistent myths about leading change are still alive. These myths hinder us instead of helping us. It is time we stop believing them.
3) 4 Tips to Make Your Team Embrace Accountability
Leading change has a lot to do with making people embrace accountability. It is a vital element for creating a collaboration culture that delivers results. How to do this?
4) Cross-Cultural Leadership: How to Avoid Making People Lose Face
The cross-cultural aspect of ‘losing face’ can play an important role when you are leading teams involving people from different cultures. It can cause misunderstandings and awkward situations between people. Some specific leadership tips can prevent this.
5) Skills for the Future: Break Patterns and Surprise Yourself, says Harvard’s Michael Puett
What are the key skills for the future? Harvard professor Michael Puett explains the skill of breaking patterns and its impact on your leadership, and on the people you interact with.
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Stop Believing These Persistent Myths About Leading Change
Let’s change the way we lead change!
In one of our most-read articles here on Leadershipwatch ‘What Does Change Mean to You?’ I describe how change always has been and always will be a natural part of our lives. We’ve dealt with change ever since we humans started to wander this globe. We have seen over and over again how it works, how we can turn it into a motivating, inspiring and successful experience instead of feeling burdened by it. But somehow some persistent myths about leading change are still alive. These myths hinder us instead of helping us. It is time we stop believing them.
Let me give you a quick overview, some food for thought, and then hand it back to you:
Myth #1: Change needs to be managed
“It is something you need to control and steer in the direction you want it to go. It requires a vast amount of analysis and planning upfront so that everybody can get clear objectives and tasks and everyone knows what to do. Change management is a set of skills you can learn by training. You need to learn the right tips & tricks and correct tools and models, and you will become successful in managing the change.”
You cannot manage change like you manage a production process in a factory.
I always use the following ground rule: the average ratio between the hard side of change (technical evolution, information – data – content, analysis – facts – figures, machines – robots, etc.) and the soft side (humans, ambitions – aspirations, habits, values, cultural alignment, shared vision – strategy, collaboration – teamwork, trust –confidence etc.) is 30/40% – 70/60%.
Leading change successfully is working 30/40% on the ‘hard’ side but 70/60% on the ‘soft’ side
Myth #2: People resist/don’t like change
“People are change-averse by nature. They like to keep the status quo. They are afraid of losing what they have. Don’t expect people to embrace change, you will have to convince and even force them otherwise they won’t move.”
Wrong! People are not afraid of change, but many of us don’t like to be changed. We like to be able to steer (or at least co-steer) when it comes to changing our situation. The more we feel a lack of control, the more our resistance will grow. The more we feel control over our own destiny and see for ourselves the opportunities for progress, growth and improvement the more we will jump forward.
Leading change means finding ways to create that climate of autonomy and ‘self steering’ in situations where whole groups of individuals, whole organizations are impacted, and where creating alignment between individual, cross-team and cross-unit differences therefore is a crucial challenge.
Successful organizations create environments where change is not perceived as a task but as an opportunity to grow as an individual in a more than strictly professional way
Myth #3: Changing other people’s mindsets is what counts
“Change means changing people’s mindset in such a way that the overall objectives can be reached. Technology, structure, processes and procedures will help, but in the end it is the mindset of the people that will make people change their behavior. Therefore a substantial amount of the energy needs to be assigned to changing the mindset of people.”
True, successful change very often implies a need for change in mindset. But can we actually change people’s mindsets? We can provide new thoughts, theories, models, or facts. We can try to explain how these have changed our own thinking. But even then, will it give us the power to change other people’s thinking? I don’t believe so. The only person you can change is yourself. When it comes to changing other people’s mindsets the best you can do is to offer alternative circumstances where people can experiment with new behavior and new patterns, and see what it brings. These new experiences will influence (and this sometimes takes a while) their thinking and eventually their mindset.
It’s easier to act your way into a new way of thinking, than to think your way into a new way of acting
Don’t let yourself be tricked by these myths!
Here are some practical pointers that might help you. I’ve seen these working successfully in many complex change situations:
- Embrace the fact that you are not able to control all elements of the change.
- What if you would shift your leadership style from controlling to facilitating/guiding?
- What if you would shift your mindset from trying to give all the answers to letting your teams come up with the answers? See what happens.
- What if your leadership style would focus more on creating team alignment about how we want to change rather than on convincing individuals to change?
- What if you would focus more on ‘helping people to steer’ rather than ‘trying to reduce resistance’?
- What if you would focus more on experimenting new behaviors than on teaching new thinking?
I’d like to know your experiences and thoughts. Feel free to share!
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Aad is a global business advisor, change leader/program manager, executive team facilitator, leadership coach, and frequently asked keynote speaker. He is founder and managing partner at HRS Business Transformation Services where he works with senior executives and their organizations globally in three key domains: ‘leading complex change’, ‘cross-cultural leadership’, and ‘post-merger integration’. Find out more about Aad, our services, and keynotes.
Skills for the Future: Break Patterns and Surprise Yourself, says Harvard’s Michael Puett
What are the key skills for the future? In our special multi-part series, experts share valuable and surprising insights we can use to build tomorrow’s world. In this part Harvard professor Michael Puett explains the skill of breaking patterns and its impact on your life, your leadership, and on the people you interact with.
The best thing about listening to someone who challenges your day-to-day assumptions is that you learn something about yourself. Michael Puett, Harvard’s tall and boyish-looking expert on ancient China, certainly made me think when he explained how we are ruled by patterns, and how we can live better lives if we learn to break those patterns. I felt sorry when his talk at The School of Life (London, February 2017) came to an end after 2 hours. I would like to meet him again.
Here are the best insights Michael Puett shared with us in London (I leave his high-pitched voice and frequent smiles to your imagination):
The true self does not exist
Puett: “There are some old Chinese ideas that challenge common western assumptions. Ideas that I think we should truly be learning from. Let’s begin with visions of the self that arose in classical China. When we are trying to find answers to the big questions we face, we are encouraged to look within, to find ourselves, to embrace and love ourselves ‘just the way we are’ – and do the same for those around us. But this idea of a true self does not exist in the Chinese tradition. According to ancient Chinese thinking, we all complex and chaotic creatures, interacting with the emotions and energies of the people around us. There is no stable self. We are all equal messes of emotions, of dispositions, tendencies and patterns. Someone yells at me, and drags out of me an energy of anger.”
We all fall into patterns, even when we don’t realize it
Puett: “Also from a very young age, we fall into patterns, and ruts and habits of responding to the world around us. These patterns then begin to define how we experience the world. They become so ardent that they can be repeated for decades, they dominate our lives. And the danger is: this is what we become as human beings. We are like automatic machines, repeating the same patterns over and over again. The self that we think exists is really the result of the patterns we have fallen into. And by the way: a lot of companies are very successfully building their entire business models on this, taking our patterns for granted.”
Recommended reading:
How AI and big data feed on and reinforce our patterns, and problems this creates
Big data and algorithms need our moral compass, here’s why
Now: suppose the old Chinese philosophers are right about this. Suppose they are capturing something about what we are like as human beings. What would be the implications?
Puett: “If they are right, what I do when I look within and find myself, is I am in danger of simply finding a bunch of ruts and patters I have fallen into. And the last thing I want to do is embrace myself for who I am, because these are just patterns I have fallen into. Some of them may work out well by accident. Most of them, however, are disruptive because I am not really interacting with the people around me, without my even noticing. And so our mantra of self-acceptance is not only potentially wrong, because it is based on an incorrect and limited view of the self, it is potentially incredibly dangerous.”
“The last thing you want to do is love and embrace your patterns. The goal is to break them.” Michael Puett
How to break your patterns
A Confucian approach, Puett explains, would be to notice your patterns and then work actively to shift them. How? By using the power of rituals, or “anything that forces you to become a different person for a brief moment of time, that forces you to physically see the world from the perspectives of others, perspectives you would otherwise never taken on. By physically forcing you to do this, it creates a break. And that break, over time, opens up the possibility to begin breaking these patterns, and begin to really interact with the world around you, instead of interacting by rote.”
Here’s an example:
You have a difficult relationship with the person you share an office with. Her comments drive you nuts. When she voices her opinion on a subject you shake your head in disbelief, you tell her what you think is right, you hope she’ll learn something from you but all you really do is fight – and it’s just been like this for years. Stuck in a pattern, you think?
Puett: “The answer is yes! It’s not that you and her just cannot get along – there is a pattern at work, a pattern you can break. How? When another conversation sets in, and you know exactly how it is going to go: do slightly different things, bring up slightly different subject, slightly change your tone of voice, begin appealing to slightly different sides of her. Asking her advice on something, for instance, can bring out her more nurturing side. You can then be somebody who is really listening to her. Start playing with these different roles a little. Over time, if you keep practicing, the patterns that have been dominating your relationship for years will start to shift. You will start interacting differently. Each of you, as you begin to see different sides of the other, will begin to talk about tons of subjects you previously couldn’t talk about, or talk about the same subjects in different ways. Little changes, even if it’s just in tone of voice, can make unbelievable differences.”
Recommended reading: ‘The only person you can actually change is yourself’
Keep training and surprise yourself
Puett, now smiling through his glasses: “Think of this as a life-long training exercise. When you start creating these breaks, you begin interacting with people differently. Over time, and more importantly, you begin really sensing them. You begin sensing the people around you as the complex creatures they really are;
You get better and better at sensing people’s patterns, your own and those around you, and at sensing what you can do to bring different sides of people out and grow genuine relationships;
You begin to act in ways that help your family, your friends and colleagues to flourish;
You begin to realize you are multiple, not a single self, we all are multiple, we are relationships all the way down, and everything is changeable – even the huge and seemingly intractable societal problems of our time. We constructed the world. We can, by training and cultivating ourselves, change it for the better. We are capable of doing this.
Maybe, just maybe, these ideas from a distant Chinese past are powerful and if we take them seriously, we open up possibilities we cannot now even imagine.”
Michael Puett is Professor of Chinese History at Harvard University. His classes have been so successful that they have been moved to the largest lecture hall available at Harvard. I read his book The Path, which he wrote together with Christine Gross-Loh, and highly recommend it.
What do you think? 2 essential questions:
- If Puett and China’s old philosophers are right, and the true self does not exist, why do we keep labeling one other? Why do we keep labeling ourselves, sometimes literally with numbers, letters or colours (referring to HR tools that are used in many companies)? Are we not at risk of focusing on just a snapshot of who we are at a particular time and place, instead of on the person we can be?
- New technologies like machine learning, big data and robotics are exciting. But is allowing these technologies to play to and reinforce our patterns such a good idea? Shouldn’t we use the same technologies differently, in ways that help us break our patterns instead (search algorithms could point us to music, voices, points of view that we would normally never listen to, for instance)?
Shoot! And many thanks for thinking along.
Photo: David/Flickr (Creative Commons)
Hanneke Siebelink is Research Partner and Writer at HRS Business Transformation Services, and author of several books. Find out more about Hanneke and HRS services. If you would like to invite us to your organization, contact us here.
Find more Expert Series articles.
Leading Change: How Slowing Down Can Help You to Make Progress
Leading large and complex change initiatives is an intensive and demanding job for those leading it and for their teams. The need for change, the timelines, the urge to meet targets and deadlines, it can put substantial pressure on teams.
As change leader you obviously support your teams, you motivate them and coach them. You lead by example and stimulate them to learn and grow, to make progress, to aim for top quality, and to become a truly winning team. It is the feeling of moving forward, of climbing our ladder of success together, which truly motivates us as a team! Right? But be careful!
Teams that are ceaselessly expanding their limits and grow their success for a period of time can lose sight of the fact that they are making progress. Despite the fact that they are moving forward and becoming better at what they do, they can show signals of demotivation, even of a decreasing trust in the team’s success.
Teams that ceaselessly expand their limits can start showing signals of demotivation and decreasing trust in the team’s success if they do not take the time to consciously experience and embed the results achieved.
Pay attention to the signals! For instance:
- Are issues and risks brought forward at the last moment instead of addressing these pro-actively?
- Do team members only report to you and never ask your advice or coaching?
- Does the team only discuss operational topics? Never sensitive topics like doubts or uncertainties?
- Do people point at others when things don’t go as planned instead of taking responsibility themselves?
Although these examples are not by definition telling you something is wrong, it would be wise not to neglect them. If you start noticing signals like these it’s maybe time to change pace. Step into your helicopter! Lift up and observe the landscape from above, from a distance. Give yourself an overview of what is going on down there. On where we came from, and where we are going. Is the road travelled clearly visible? How have we changed during our journey so far? Can you see this? Can you see the road ahead? Good! Now bring your team onboard of your helicopter and invite them to also have a look. Take a step back together and take the time to see from above. Ask your team to reflect on what they see and to share this with each other. How do we see the road ahead? How can we use what we’ve learned so far in the rest of our journey? Take some time to slow down together! Your team needs it to let its success sink in. This will give your people the energy to continue to build results.
How do you notice the signals in your team? When did you last get into your helicopter? What did you see?
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Photo: © HRS Business Transformation Services
Aad is a global business advisor, change leader/program manager, executive team facilitator, leadership coach, and frequently asked keynote speaker. He is founder and managing partner at HRS Business Transformation Services where he works with senior executives and their organizations globally in three key domains: ‘leading complex change’, ‘cross-cultural leadership’, and ‘post-merger integration’. Find out more about Aad, our services, and keynotes.
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